Writing RAK

December 22, 2015 Tamara

The house is dark and quiet, the rain is gently tapping on my living room window, and my keyboard is lit by the glowing white lights of my Christmas tree.

That’s right – Christmas tree.

The last time I published a post on this blog it was Black Friday (AKA “RAK” Friday for me); now the presents are wrapped and I am yet again counting days with anticipation to Friday.

It’s been a challenging year for me to write. I have delved into new projects, new initiatives, new learning experiences, each of which have developed me as a learner in profound ways. I’ve sat on the sidelines of joy, grief, frustration, and helplessness as I’ve watched my mother and mother-in-law make their way down the paved road of life approaching the finish line. Their worn, muddy, running shoes will become angel wings when I least expect it.

I’ve been busy with my children who are all in very different stages of life. Lost teeth. Braces. College applications. It seems we are entering the growing pains of transition and I’m not quite sure I’m ready. But then again are we ever ready for the unknown?

I find when my writing takes a hiatus, it’s a season of watching. Waiting. Listening. I still perform my random acts of kindness as I always do, I simply don’t blog the stories, just joting notes on my phone as I go about my day. It seems in these moments I’m more aware of other writers who are making their own impact on the world – one RAK at a time.

Earlier in the year, I blogged about writers who generously donated their books and it reminded me of additional writers who are doing the same. I am inspired by their kindness and wanted to take a moment to share how their RAKs impacted me!

The Seventh Wish

This fall, Kate Messner offered to send her soon-to-be published book, The Seventh Wish, to a select group of students who might be interested in reading her book, then writing a “Kid Blurb” book review to post online. WOW! I threw my name in the hat (for my oldest son and for other students at the school where I work) and hoped for the best. We had never received a book directly from a publisher before, so I wasn’t sure if we even had a shot at being selected.

I was ecstatic when the book arrived a few weeks later! JOY! My son immediately started reading, excited to be one of the first to read her words. My joy turned to jubilation when I learned that Kate Messner would be visiting my youngest son’s school in December. What were the chances?

There’s more to share about Kate Messner’s kindness (there’s too much to write in this space!), but here are a few photos from the day we met her and received her autograph. What an amazing moment for us both, and a beautiful act of kindness to share!

Lisa Goes to England

A few years ago, one of my friends from high school expressed his desire to write a children’s book. We chatted a bit about characters and story lines, imagining the day we would both step out of our comfort zone and follow our dreams. I’m happy to share that Patrick beat me to the punch with his first book, Lisa Goes to England, published this summer.

In November, as Patrick was traveling by train from New Jersey to Virginia, a mother and her daughter shared a seat so that he could have a place to sit. The pair had a collection of children’s books they were reading and Patrick felt that familiar nudge to do something good. He reached into his bag, grabbed a copy of his book (which he was taking to a book signing), and presented it to the little girl and her mom.

Ironically, the mom shared that they were traveling to England in two weeks and immediately started reading Patrick’s book to her daughter, pointing out some of the landmarks they would visit on their trip. What an amazing coincidence! A perfectly planned RAK!

This week Patrick stopped by to present me with my very own signed copy of his book. What a joy to receive such unexpected kindness and visit with a long-time friend!

Speak the Word Only

Last week another friend I’ve known since elementary school shared a random act of kindness that touched my heart for many reasons. Holly had lost her mom in the spring, but decided to make copies of a book her mom wrote to pass along to anyone who might like to have it:

What a sweet, loving gesture to share a treasured book with a stranger! A beautiful RAK indeed!

All of these wonderful acts of kindness remind me of the joy in not just the art of writing, but the connectedness we feel when we know someone else is reading our words. Like right now! You are taking time out of your busy day to read MY words; your kindness encourages me to learn more, write more, BE more.

May your holiday season be filled with joy and may your hearts be filled with love for those around you. As always, thanks for reading and sharing!

RAK Friday 2015

November 27, 2015 Tamara

One of my favorite “non-holidays” of the year is #RAKFriday, traditionally known as Black Friday, the busiest shopping day of the year. I truly love being out and about, mingling with the crowds and immersing myself in the first official day of Christmas shopping.

What makes a #RAKFriday different than Black Friday? It’s a simple shift in perspective! Those participating in #RAKFriday make a commitment to do something nice or kind for a stranger throughout the day, then share their story through Twitter or Facebook, inspiring others to do the same. You can click here to read more about #RAKFriday if you like.

This year, I invited my teenaged daughter to join me in the fun and frolic. This was her first adventure shopping the day after Thanksgiving and we had a blast! Below are just a few of the things we did to bless others:

We started our day at Target, when the sky was dark and moon still out. Here we bought some toys to bless local children as part of our community’s “Fox Holiday Sox” (we will continue to purchase more items until their stockings are overflowing!)

At NY&Co, we donated money to St. Jude’s and got to ring the bell! I love shopping in stores that make a commitment to donate to charity (especially St. Jude’s which is near and dear to our hearts!)

At Bath & Body Works we left some coupons for someone else to use (one included a free gift!)

At JCPenney, I discovered a mess in the fitting room, so I hung the clothes nicely on the hangers and put them where they belonged. Working retail can be an exhausting job, especially on Black Friday. While it may not seem like much, it was a small gesture of kindness that made my heart happy!

When I left the store, I hid another coupon to brighten a shopper’s day.

I left a few dollar bills tucked in between toys at Five & Below but was having so much fun I forgot to snap a photo. Oops! I also ran into my cousins, Wendy and Tori, which was like a RAK for me! So fun!
My daughter hates to take selfies with me, but I convinced her to take one through an ornament hanging on the tree at the mall. Another RAK for me!

I treated my daughter to a surprise sushi lunch at a new restaurant, then tipped the waiter 40% of the bill (20% for me and 20% for her, just because it’s fun to overtip!) I didn’t take a photo of the bill, but managed to snap one of the sushi we shared – yum!

At Old Navy, I overheard a customer trying to find a coat for her son in the same size I had in my hands. Without hesitation, I handed her the coat. She was so surprised! No photo, but the memory of her smile still shines brightly in my mind. 🙂
In the checkout line, I allowed three people to go ahead of me as I waited for my daughter to join me. Again, not a huge RAK, but all 3 people smiled back in appreciation.
When we arrived home from our long day of shopping, I cracked open the sparkling cider and shared a toast with my daughter, celebrating her first official #RAKFriday. Her initiation is now complete and my heart is full, being able to share in a day of kindness with her.

May your holiday season be filled with peace, love and joy, and may you continue to find small ways to share kindness with others!

Thank you for blessing me as a faithful reader of my RAK posts! 😊

Kind Actions, Renee RAK

RAK Roundup

November 21, 2015 Tamara

There have been so many RAKs this week, I thought I would just post them all in one place! Here’s a RAK Roundup overflowing with thankfulness!

Surprise Gifts

Last week a package arrived at my doorstep from my sweet friend, Sarah Armentrout, who lives 2 hours away. This was such a surprise! What on earth could she have sent me?

I savored the moment of opening the box, even waiting a few days to enjoy the anticipation of revealing something unknown. Oh, the delight when I saw what she gave me – a beautiful Macintosh Apple scented candle!

In the enclosed note (shaped like two apples), she referenced a conversation we shared where I had discussed a recent apple picking trip that, alas, had no apples to pick. What a lovely, thoughtful gesture to brighten my day – now I can enjoy the scent of apples in my home leading all the way up to the holiday season! Joy!

Her gift was also a great reminder of the power in listening and acting on the whisper of your heart.

Secret Santa Scam

How many of you got “scammed” by the recent posts on Facebook asking you to send a gift of $10 or less to a stranger, then get 6 of your friends to do the same and you would receive 36 gifts in return? Anyone?

A friend of mine posted this offer and I took it for exactly what it was – a gamble of kindness. I could either win big or end up $10 in the hole. Was it worth the risk?

I decided to join in. After all, you’re talking to the gal who finds SO MUCH JOY in giving to others – in my mind, there was no risk at all! I received the name of the person I was asked to bless, and a few details about her. The main thing she mentioned was that she loved gift cards and her favorite color was purple.

Purple. The color of orchids, lilacs and lavender. The color of my grandmother’s birthstone and my daughter’s class ring. The color of Renee’s casket.

I purchased a beautiful purple scarf with a little bit of sparkle, in memory of Renee and my grandma. I also bought a Panera gift card, thinking of my daughter’s smile when we have our girl-time lunch dates. Then I wrapped the items in sparkle tissue paper and took the package to mail at the post office.

Will I receive 36 gifts in return? Highly doubtful. I would be shocked to receive even three! But you know what? Here’s the deal: I didn’t join this Secret Santa exchange to get a bunch of stuff for free. I did it as a way to bless someone I didn’t know with the joy of a surprise.

And if you know anything about me at all, you know how much I love surprises! 😊

New Markers

Ask any elementary teacher if they need classroom supplies and you will always hear a resounding, “YES!” Whether it’s post-it notes or glue sticks, teachers are always needing more.

This week, I was collaborating with a fourth grade class when my Expo marker ran dry, right as I was listing the key components of a digital creation assignment. Without hesitation, the classroom teacher left the lab and returned with a metal pail filled with Expo markers. “Here! Have them!” she replied as she put the container on my desk. Wow! What a perfectly timed random act of kindness! Thanks so much, Krista Miller, for blessing our computer lab with new markers!

Hit and Hug

On Thursday night, my daughter and I went to see the latest Hunger Games movie, which has become a tradition for the past 4 years. The movie was great, even though my daughter refused to smile for a picture.

As we began our journey home, we were suddenly rear-ended in a single line of traffic. Oh my goodness! Visibly shaken, my daughter and I pulled over and called 911 to assist.

The man who hit us was very apologetic, checking to make sure we were OK. While waiting for the police to arrive and assess the damage, we chatted a bit and both were thankful the accident wasn’t worse. “Would it be OK if I gave you a hug?” he asked. It was a very sweet gesture in the midst of a not-so-pleasant car accident, and I was grateful for his kindness.

When the officer arrived on the scene, he was also kind and compassionate, even letting me borrow his pen to fill out the paperwork. He called a tow truck for the man, whose vehicle was too damaged to drive.

While no one ever wants to be involved in an accident, a hit-and-hug was much more enjoyable than a hit-and-run!

50 Circles of Happiness

Friday morning our boss arrived to our team meeting with a box of Dunkin’ Donuts doughnut holes. With a smile on her face she announced, “Fifty Circles of Happiness! Take some and pass around the table!”

Have I mentioned lately how much I admire my boss? She is always going out of her way to show kindness to our team, and today’s gesture of thoughtfulness was just what we needed to start our meeting with smiles and laughter.

———

As I reflect on this past week with its highs and lows, I am blessed beyond measure that my path is sprinkled with kind people and warm hearts. While I can’t change the horror and violent destruction others experience daily (and I have no solution for the “big issues” of poverty and refugees), I can always take a moment to appreciate the good in this world and share how others have a positive impact on me.

And for that alone, I am thankful. 😊

Blessing Others, Kind Actions

Good Cheer

November 13, 2015 Tamara

This afternoon I decided to leave school at a decent time (something about being the last car in the parking lot twice this week, walking alone in the dark, makes me remember how much I dislike the time change!) I still had work to do, so I thought it would be a nice change to visit a local Starbucks and continue my tasks with a warm Skinny Peppermint Mocha by my side.

The coffee shop was brimming with people; most seats were taken, but I was lucky enough to snag a comfy armchair by the window (and an outlet!) Two of my co-workers called out to me and after a few moments of chit-chat, I claimed my chair of choice and got in line to purchase my drink.

That’s when I saw the sign.

Buy one, get one free! Awesome! I turned to the person beside me and smiled. “Are you getting a holiday drink today?” I asked. She returned my smile and replied, “Oh yes!” My smile grew as I pointed to the sign behind the barista. “I’m going to buy your drink today – you can have my free one!” The woman was surprised at my gesture, offering to pay half, but I just laughed in the joy of the moment. “No, no, this is a random act of kindness for YOU! Please don’t pay for a thing!” We ordered our drinks and I gave her my business card so she could read about her RAK later. She asked me if I was a teacher and when I nodded yes, she said, “Everything about you seems like a teacher!” I was humbled by her compliment, reminded again of the joy I have in my career.

She didn’t want her photo taken, so I captured one of our cups – two strangers enjoying a shared moment of glee.

You know what’s really awesome about today’s RAK? Neither one of us cared what color cup our coffee was served in, nor did we engage in a theological debate about symbolism or religion. It was just one person doing something nice for someone else with a promise to “pay it forward for the next person.”

Isn’t that what it’s all about? 🙂

As we enter the holiday season, transitioning from carved pumpkins to carved turkey, I encourage you to look for opportunities to show kindness to others in unexpected ways. It doesn’t take much to brighten a stranger’s day!

Be blessed and as always, thanks for reading! More blog posts to come soon – I have so many stories to share!

Blessing Others, Kind Actions

The Seventh Wish

October 17, 2015 Tamara

When was the last time you received a package in the mail? No, not a shipment from Amazon that you purchased with your credit card. I mean a REAL package. A gift. A surprise. Something just for you. Has it been a while?

This past week I received a package that LITERALLY made me squeal with joy! It was an unpublished, advance uncorrected proof of Kate Messner’s new book The Seventh Wish that was sent directly to me from Bloomsbury Publishers! This book won’t be available for purchase until June 2016, but I had it in my hands! SQUEAL!!

For the past two summers, I have participated in Teachers Write: a virtual writing experience that consists of four weeks of daily writing prompts led by dozens of authors who write the books we read in and out of the classroom. These authors share their advice, offer suggestions, encourage us to learn and grow. Best of all, they actually read the posts we write and provide feedback (WOW factor, right here!) Created by Kate Messner, this writing opportunity has completely changed the way I approach composition, both as a teacher and an author. (Yes, I am using that term loosely. I have written blogs and published articles, but you know I want to write that book about kindness and life purpose!)

The great part of belonging to a writing community is that the connection doesn’t end when the tasks are completed. Even though the assignments and challenges ceased with the summer sun, we are still writing and sharing through social media.

A few weeks ago Kate posted that her newest book, The Seventh Wish, was nearing publication and she wanted to try something new for the book’s release. She asked if any of her teacher friends would be willing to read her book, then share with students to read, so that children could write the book reviews instead of adults.

I think this may be the actual moment I started squealing.

I threw my name in the hat, hoping to be chosen from hundreds of responses across globe, but figured it was wishful thinking at best. And then, with little fanfare or presentation, there was a simple manilla package waiting in my mailbox: The Seventh Wish.

This random act of kindness from Kate Messner and Bloomsbury Publishing made my heart soar this week. I can’t wait to curl up on my sofa, warm fleece blanket wrapped around my lap, with uninterrupted time to read her new book. I’m sure it will be just as awesome as her other books on the shelf! Then, as the ultimate pay-it-forward RAK, I will pass the book along to children in my school who will read, review, and share. What a gift indeed!

Blessing Others, Kind Actions, Kind Words

7 Truths About 25th Class Reunions

October 4, 2015 Tamara

Last night I attended my high school’s 25th class reunion. While social media has made the art of maintaining friendships almost seamless (even if only in a virtual world of sharing photos and birthday greetings), there’s no comparison to actually visiting with friends in person! The four-hour event was held at a local brewery with threats of hurricanes and floods forecasted a few days prior. While the severe weather hampered many travel plans to attend, those who came out in the cold, dreary rain enjoyed a night filled with reminiscing and reconnecting.

There are 7 truths about 25th class reunions I discovered last night, in the midst of chatting with my friends. While I’m sure some of these may shift a bit for generational references, I’m pretty sure most are vividly accurate:

1. Nobody cares who you’re dating, what you’re wearing, or how much you weigh.

All the teenage stress and angst about appearance and social status simply fade into the background as you age. Sure, you may struggle with your own inadequacies (don’t we all?), but attending your 25th class reunion is a bit like entering Cheers, where everyone knows your name (well, at least when you’re wearing your name tag). You are not judged by how high your bangs are nor the amount of Sun-In soaked in your hair. There’s no one waiting at the door to see what vehicle you’re driving. We are bigger, smaller, taller, wider. Some peaked in high school and some are just now coming into their own. It’s all OK!

You are not classified by your social or financial worth. Nobody is walking around reminding you of your high school GPA and cross-referencing it with the accomplishments of your adult years. And unless you are wearing raw meat around your neck like Lady Gaga, few people will remember what outfit you decided to wear to the reunion. At a casual event like ours, there was a wonderful mix of jeans, dress slacks, sparkled tops, t-shirts, and button-downs (although I will admit that I was a bit disappointed John wasn’t wearing his brilliant blue cape from our last gathering, lol.)

2. Name tags are essential.

Let’s face it – 25 years is a long time. We have now spent more years in our lives outside of school than in. And we are 25 years older, which means our memory may not be as sharp as it once was (speaking for myself, of course!) Name tags make introductions SO much easier, especially when you are trying to place a face to a name from a class of 460 students. Unless, of course, your name is Steve and you spend most of the evening stealing other people’s name tags to wear as your own.

The running joke last night was, “Is this a classmate or someone’s spouse?”

3. Perfect strangers will smile at you, if you smile first.

I know this will be shocking to some, but not everyone marries their high school sweetheart. (Gasp!) Most people find their spouses or significant others later in life, often from other hometowns or states (even across the globe!) For those +1 attendees caught in the mire of fabled stories from yesteryear, a class reunion can be a long, drawn-out event of awkwardness and people watching. I tried to make a point to smile at everyone I could, whether I knew them or not. It was an easy random act of kindness that anyone can do (class reunion or not!)

4. Break dancing and mosh pits are out, but the Electric Slide and Cupid Shuffle still draw a crowd.

You must, I repeat, you MUST have a DJ at your indoor class reunion. The music that’s played can make or break a crowd and sets the tone for fun and festivity. While dancing was not the focus of our reunion (I mentioned that we are 25 years older, right?), it was enjoyable to find a crew of classmates who didn’t mind making fools of themselves as they tried to remember steps for a line dance popular years ago. Who knows… it might even be a spotlight moment for a classmate to showcase their talent, as we saw with Chris and Lori stealing the show.

I think that ended our line dancing for the night. They were simply amazing! A special thanks to Luke Gipson, who was an awesome DJ for this reunion and the last one we held – hire him quick!

5. There are always new things to learn about people you’ve known forever.

The topics of conversation at 25th class reunions are generally the same: How have you been? What are you doing now? Do you have any children? Where should we go after this? If you find yourself in a conversation for more than 5 minutes (which is actually harder than it sounds), you will inevitably start walking down Memory Lane. Shared memories are great, especially when several people chime in with their versions of the same story.

Last night I learned that Jennifer spent more money on her prom dress than I spent on my wedding dress and that Stephanie saved for years to have her dress custom-made. While these tidbits may not impact one’s life on a grand scale, they open the door even wider to a shared communal experience that can only come from being in high school together. (And just for the record, Jennifer looked FANTASTIC in that green sparkled dress she wore in high school!)

6. Social media allows the party to continue long after you’ve left the building.

All day my news feed has been flooded with photos and posts from last night. There have been countless comments of positive praise, shared sentiments, and plans to get together soon. We’ve even gone so far as to suggest having a yearly reunion, offering suggestions of how, when, and where.

As a high school student 25 years ago, I’m not sure that I would say our class was close. There were just too many students, in tight, cramped, outdoor hallways filled with asbestos signs and construction hazards. We found our tribe and stayed tight with that group until the road to Beach Week stretched before us. And yet… here we are. We’ve found our tribe once again, but the barriers of acceptance have long since washed away with time. I feel like I’ve attended your children’s birthday parties, mourned the loss of your family members, and celebrated all the milestones you’ve chosen to share. A class reunion simply allows me to hear the stories in person.

7. Hugs from old friends are the best random acts of kindness to receive.

It doesn’t matter who you are or where you came from; if you approach me at a class reunion, you’re going to get hugged. I could write an entire post on the benefits of hugging, (or not – it’s already been done by someone else here), but it’s suffice to say that a 25th class reunion is a room filled with people hugging at one time or another. Whether it’s the non-committal side hug of a stranger, or the enveloping bear hug of a friend, this is the one universal sign of welcome at a class reunion. If you are one who really doesn’t like physical touch, let me warn you now. A reunion can sometimes be viewed as a hug-fest. But hugs also count as random acts of kindness, letting others know they are welcomed, accepted, and missed.

For those who were unable to attend our 25th class reunion, I hope we can bring you out to our next social gathering. For those from our class who took the lead on organizing this event and assisting with details (Amie, Laurie, Michele, Donna, Debra, Diane, Kevin and countless others who chimed in on our group page) – a HUGE thank you for providing us an opportunity and space to come together for a few hours, set aside the woes of adulthood, and remember again how blessed we are to have friends that last a lifetime.

Until we meet again!

Kind Actions

Fish Extender – The Beginning

August 23, 2015 Tamara

About a month ago, I blogged about the start of our family vacation. Since that time, my list of “must write” blog posts has expanded from a couple to more than a dozen. Egads! So many stories to share and not enough hours in the day! So rather than jumping in with current RAKs, I’m back-tracking a bit to make sure I capture all the stories from the past month, lest they dissipate like the morning dew on a hot summer day.

At the end of July, my family took a long-awaited Disney Cruise vacation to Alaska. I say “long-awaited” because it took us several years of planning and saving to make it happen. As our departure date grew near, I started perusing the internet for any last-minute insights on what we might see or do while visiting the various ports. One link led to another and I found myself on a Disney discussion board forum, reading the posts from other travelers.

I saw several posts titled “Fish Extenders” and I laughed at my own naivety, wondering why on earth any one would want to make a fish longer. Intrigued, I clicked on the link to open the post and -WHAM- I suddenly found myself caught up in this magical, wondrous world of Disney Cruise random acts of kindness.

A fish extender is a hanging pocket carrier that you create and hang from a fish hook outside of your cabin door. (All Disney Cruises have fish hooks for crew members to leave messages or other forms of communication.) There are Facebook groups that people can join to be a member of a fish extender group for a particular cruise. Once in a group, you share your information and agree to a form of “RAK reciprocity” where you will give other members in your group a little surprise during the cruise and they will do the same for you. (That’s a VERY short summary – click here to dig deeper and learn more about fish extenders!)

Now you can image how EXCITED I became when I realized 1) this type of RAK even existed and 2) I could actually participate! WOOOO-HOOOO! The adrenaline rushed through me so quickly, I knew I just HAD to jump in!

Then reality hit. This was Monday night. I had to be at work all day on Tuesday. That left Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday to pull all this together as our flight was departing first thing Saturday morning. Was it even worth the effort?

I don’t know when you last went on a family vacation, but the week before a trip is simply chaotic with all the planning, organizing, and packing. Add to that five family members, flying, with the goal of only 3 bags of checked luggage between us all. We had such limited time, but… but… but… how could I possibly resist the pull of a magical RAK?

I joined the FB group and added myself to the list of Pixie Dusters. (That’s a small group of people who join too late to be a part of the actual fish extender exchange, but would like to give/receive randomly.) I spent most of the day on Wednesday searching for a hanging organizer that would meet the length/width specifications as well as having enough pockets for my family of five, but after multiple store visits, I quickly realized I would have to make one myself. (Egads – I didn’t factor THAT into my limited timeline! I don’t even own a sewing machine!)

I bought some cloth napkins and a fabric table runner and got to work. It took almost the entire three days to complete the fish extender (we won’t discuss how many hours of hand-sewing), but it was finished in time for our trip! Yay!

As I was making the fish extender, a dear friend from high school, Kim, noticed my posting on one of the Dis Boards. She reached out to me and asked if I would have any use for some crystal Mickey Mouse figures. I was so excited to accept her generous gift! (And it was awesome to catch up with her after so many years!)

She told me she just signed a contract to teach first grade with a neighboring school district, so I grabbed some books of my son’s bookshelf to get her started with a classroom library.

After she left, I added the crystal Mickey Mouse figures as well as a few more embellishments, then our fish extender was done!

My next blog post will highlight the gifts we made over those three days to bless others on our trip – make sure to check back soon to read more!

Kind Actions

Yellow Brick Road

August 13, 2015 Tamara

Do you ever have those mornings where you wake from a dream, still half-asleep, remembering bits and pieces of the plot, trying to recapture the events before they fade away? Or maybe you wake with such clarity, a problem solved, a peace that suddenly washes over you like fresh water from a crystal-clear mountain stream.

Both happened to me this week.

I was thinking about my mom, who was diagnosed with extensive stage small cell lung cancer in June. (Go ahead and Google it – it’s the worst kind.) Her health has rapidly declined; from sitting on the sidelines cheering at my son’s soccer game in late May to sleeping in a recliner with an oxygen tank in August. She has a big trip planned in a few weeks to Boston; the chemo stripping away her hair is providing her the extra boost to make the trip a reality. We spend our days not making plans for coming years, but cherishing the moments of now and laughing about the memories of before.

My mom has been blessed by the kindness of others. When I returned from my vacation, she couldn’t wait to show me all the “treats” she received from close friends during my absence. Magazines. Candy. Amazon gift cards (she has a Kindle and loves to read). Beauty products. Cards. Small little treasures with encouraging words. Hats. Chocolate.

She was in tears reflecting on the kindness of others in her time of greatest need. The thoughtfulness. The generosity. The compassion. These are words that now take on new meaning for my mom. She even received a handwritten letter from a girl who knew her as a child – my mom taught her how to ice skate and even to this day, the girl-turned-woman wanted my mom to know how special that day was for her.

We shared a long conversation about how people react when you tell them this kind of news and how your relationship with certain people changes. To quote her directly, “You really do see who your true friends are.” I reminded her that some people haven’t had a lot of experience with someone dying; others may be frozen in the perpetual state of “I don’t know what to say/do/feel.” She nodded, more in acceptance than agreement.

My mom is walking on the yellow brick road.

She landed here in a whirlwind, totally unprepared, taken completely off-guard; a stranger in the midst of doctors, legalities, and chemicals she can barely pronounce, much less spell. She is told to move forward. Get started. Go.

Follow the yellow brick road.

Follow, follow, follow, follow, follow the yellow brick road.

(I bet I have you singing now, don’t I? Ahhhh, a little laughter to lighten the load is always nice.)

Just like in the movie, my mom is following the advice of others and hoping for the best. She will encounter people along her path that will become new friends and others that simply slip away unseen. She will have to crawl through meadows that glisten brightly, invitingly, but end up making her so exhausted she can’t keep her eyes open. She will encounter setbacks that darken her skies and threaten her with fear.

She will have to make decisions on her own and hope the road leads her to the place where her friends can receive courage, insight, and overflowing hearts of love. Despite her final wish to return to the place she calls home, she will want confirmation that her friends received their gifts first.

Did I mention that my mom’s name is Dorothy? It’s true.

My mom is on the yellow brick road. She is following the path, walking one foot in front of the other (even if only in her mind.) She will take that trip to Boston and it will be fantastic! She will then return home to more rounds of chemo that will hopefully give her a bit more bonus time to enjoy.

As her only child, and loudest spokesperson (the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, lol), I want to say thank you. Thank you for remembering my mom. Thank you for being mature enough to let bygones be bygones and see the person she is now, not the person she was before. Thank you for leaving notes on her Facebook page, even if only to say “Hi, thinking of you.” Thank you for reminding her of all the wonderful reasons to live and the impact she’s had on your life. Thank you for remembering her husband and surprising her with unexpected treats and goodies. Thank you for your acts of kindness.

I don’t know how many miles this yellow brick road stretches out. I do know that when the road ends, she will meet the grand Oz himself and she will be reminded with a whisper in her ear: “You always had the power, my dear, you just had to learn it yourself.”

Kind Actions, Renee RAK

RAK for Renee – 14 Quarters

July 9, 2015 Tamara

To honor the memory of Renee Parr, her family asked those that loved her to complete 14 random acts of kindness as we approach the one year anniversary of her passing, July 14, 2014.

Last Saturday, my two older children came with me to The Dollar Tree as we picked up some last minute glow sticks for our 4th of July festivities. As we paid for our purchases, I saw my son go to the candy machines and check to see what was inside. In an instant, I felt that nudge and suddenly I knew what I wanted to do to honor Renee’s memory:

I wanted to share in the joy of surprises for children.

I dug around in my purse for all the quarters I could find – only two, but better than nothing. I opened my wallet to count my cash and there found disappointment as well – two single dollar bills folded behind my license. One more search in my purse resulted in a third dollar bill, crumpled and disheveled, the edges ripped and worn.

Two quarters and three dollar bills.

I asked the sales clerk if she could change my bills into quarters and she refused, saying she didn’t have any quarters in her tray. In desperation, I located the store manager and explained the RAK I wanted to do, its purpose to honor the memory of Renee. She used her master key to open two additional registers and finally we were able to complete the transation.

Two quarters and three dollar bills, now 14 quarters to give away.

It didn’t take the children long to fill all the candy machines. Some required two quarters; some only one. They finished their task with two quarters left and had to decide which “big machine” would receive the money.

Renee was always a princess, to her family and her friends, so it was only fitting that the remaining coins went to the Frozen Disney Princesses Tattoos.

We took a moment, my children and I, and said a silent prayer for Renee’s family and those sweet children who would receive the joy of a Renee RAK. She will always be in our hearts, forever.

If you would like to share your Renee RAK, click here to add your information. If you would like to see some of the other random acts of kindness completed in memory of Renee, click here.

Blessing Others, Kind Actions, Kind Words

#ISTE2015 Truly Random Acts of Kindness

July 9, 2015 Tamara

Recently, I found myself in a heated discussion with someone else about the role “random” plays in the phrase “random acts of kindness” (also known as a RAK or RAOK.)

“You can’t call it a RAK if it’s not random. The fact that you are pre-planning the event takes away from the novelty of it being a true random act of kindness.”

My first instinct was to fight. To argue. To defend my position on RAKs: my purpose, my mission, my style. I was caught in the whirlwind of surprise and disbelief.

And then I laughed.

Yes, it’s true, I have been known to laugh at the most inappropriate times. Humor is probably my strongest defense mechanism and I use it without thinking. What a wonderful world we live in that we can have such petty disagreements as to whether or not a RAK could be random or pre-planned!

So I bring to you my last set of RAKs from the ISTE 2015 Conference – a set of TRULY random acts of kindness that made my heart happy:

Portable Battery Charger

As many of you know, Twitter is the social media of choice for technology conferences. Even if you’re not physically able to attend the conference, you can easily glean resources and make connections using the conference hashtag. To get an idea of the power of a PLN, search the hashtags #ISTE2015, #ISTE15, #notatiste15 and #notatiste. There’s a wealth of resources right at your fingertips!

When you physically attend a conference, the worst thing that could happen is your device shutting down from low battery. I hate when this happens, so I always come prepared. While waiting for the first Ignite session, I sent out a tweet referencing my portable battery chargers (I had three in my purse, ready to go at a moment’s notice) and the power strip peeking out of my purse. Several people read my tweet and commented back, then the conversation was lost in a sea of retweets, mentions, and hashtags.

A few hours later as we made our way back to the conference center to listen to the first Keynote speaker, I saw this tweet in my newsfeed:

Oh how funny! The tweet made me laugh, that someone actually remembered my previous comment. I tweeted out a photo of my charger case in response with the comment, “Hope you like pink!”

Suddenly it hit me. This guy really did need a charger! Going into a Keynote session with only 23% battery life? He wouldn’t even MAKE it to the main speaker in time. It was then that the joking over Twitter transformed into a true RAK as I set out to find him, tweeting my location and searching the crowd to find his group.

Yeah… 21,000 registered attendees and I was trying to find a guy I had never met. What were the chances?

Well, with a bit of perseverance, half a dozen tweets, and a great big dash of luck, we were able to connect and I gave him my portable charger to use. I walked away, thrilled! It was AWESOME to help someone else in their time of need, even if only for an extended battery life! I told him we had to take a selfie as proof (and no worries… we met up the next day when he not only gave me my charger back, but also gave me another I could add to my collection! A pay-it-forward RAK back!)

The best irony of all? The person in this photo is Jason Markey (@JasonMMarkey), principal of East Leyden High School in Franklin Park, IL. After I snapped the selfie with my phone, he said, “I loved your Ignite session on Random Acts of Kindness last year.” His comment left me literally speechless! Little did he know, I started following his #leydenpride hashtag shortly after last year’s ISTE Conference, blown away by his school’s commitment to sharing kindness through Twitter. What a small world!

Rain Jacket

When we arrived in Philly on Saturday night, the weather was nasty: cold, wet, rainy. The umbrella I brought was little protection from the wind and driving rain that pounded sideways against my skin. My coworker, Heather, offered up her rain jacket and I accepted with glee! What a perfectly timed, completely random RAK!

Speaking of rain, a huge shout-out to Heather (@hcausey) and Stacie (@sctaylorITRT) who shared the driving responsibilities there and back in the midst of crazy traffic and endless rainstorms. These gals are AWESOME and you should definitely follow them on Twitter!

Happy Birthday Flash Mob

As we were traveling to dinner one evening in the city, we spotted our dear friend, Chris O’Neal (@onealchris), who now lives states away from our district. We immediately ran up and did a “Celebrity Selfie Flash Mob” (where we quickly gathered around him and snapped a photo). As we finished, he made the comment that it was an awesome birthday present (“What? Today is your BIRTHDAY?!?!”) so we immediately serenaded him with the Happy Birthday song right there on the streets of Philly. Totally random and so much fun!

The Liberty Bell

My oldest son is fascinated by coins. He has spent countless hours researching the images and words shown on coins and at a moment’s notice can give you a “Fun Fact of the Day” related to the history of any coin you find. When I told him I was traveling to Philadelphia, PA for the ISTE Conference, he said with amazement, “You mean where the Liberty Bell is? Did you know the half dollar has the Liberty Bell on it? And you get to see it for REAL?” To say he was excited for me to experience this little part of history was a grand understatement.

Due to the rain and our packed schedule (as well as hotel accommodations outside the city limits), it didn’t look like we would have time to visit the historical site. I tried to prep him the best I could when I called home the second day of the conference, but his disappointment was tangible, even states away.

And then… my amazing coworkers assembled one afternoon in the midst of rain storms and sun, grabbed me and said, “Let’s go!” We had no idea where we were walking; we took a turn right, then backtracked left, but eventually made it to the location of the famed symbol for independence. We made sure to take a photo to send back home to my son.

I have the best team EVER!

May I Take Your Photo?

It may seem like such a small RAK, offering to take someone else’s photo, but what a wonderful way to help someone else capture a memory forever. I caught my coworker, Casey (@cnugentITRT), offering such kindness to a group of strangers as we were leaving a restaurant and made sure to capture the moment for my own Smile File.

Expo Hall

One of the busiest places at the ISTE Conference is the Expo Hall. Hundreds of vendors, all vying for your attention, hoping to reel you in with the latest and greatest tool or “must have” addition to your school or district. Many times vendors come prepared to entice with freebies, small trinkets to give away to say “Thanks” or promote their business.

While I know the end result for vendors is to walk away with sales and commissions, I am repeatedly impressed by their generosity. One vendor had these cute little bee shaped figures decorating their space. When I stopped to admire one, the sales rep said I could have one. I thanked her, but declined; my three kids would fight over who got to keep the toy. She simply smiled and gave me three of them, then handed me three foam airplane kits, too. Wow! How thoughtful!

I stopped at another vendor station, enticed by their PLN buttons I had seen other people wearing. When I explained that I was doing a PD presentation focused on expanding your PLN through socia media, she reached under the table and handed me an entire bag of buttons. Not one. Not two. Not even five. AN ENTIRE BAG! I was so giddy, I could barely contain my glee!

So much generosity. Sheets of stickers. Pointers. Keychains. If you’ve ever had a conversation with an elementary teacher, you know they are desperate for any toy or knick-knack to stock their prize box or classroom store. These trinkets were treasures indeed!

I even had Billy Krakower (@wkrakower), the amazing co-moderator of #satchat and #njed messaging me to give me a ribbon for my badge, a Tomorrow’s Classrooms Today shirt, and some travel bags. He was so kind to go out of his way to connect with me in the midst of this enormous group of people just to pass along his kindness.

As you can see from the stories above, the truly random acts of kindness are just as meaningful as the ones that are pre-planned. Many of you do these types of RAKs on a regular basis and never give a thought to just how wonderful your actions are for the receiver. For me, conferences are a fantastic venue to notice unique opportunities to bless others.

And to round out all the RAKs, I even had another gal compliment me on my favorite skirt. 🙂